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Tuesday, September 8, 2009

So much to do... and yet

Don't you just hate it when so much time has gone by since you last blogged and there's just so much to catch up on, and you have so much time to do it...and yet, you so much just don't want to? Yeah that's about where I'm at.
Here's a little bit of an update: we're back in Michigan. Branden starts school today. I was hoping to be able to too, but we got up here too late. Maybe next semester? At the moment I'm stressing about finding a job. Lansing is on a hiring freeze because of GM shutting down and laying off like 21,000 people. Everywhere I go people just laugh and say, "yeah leave an application." I've learned that means "Where are you from you kiddo? Mars? Of course we're not really hiring."
Anyways since I've been up since 5 when the GM plant decided to switch on the jet engine. No really it sounds like your standing behind a rocket taking off. Gotta love this town with the police keeping you up all night with their sirens, and the rocket ship switching on every morning I'm predicting a bunch more of these random writings. Hope you enjoy I thought they were funny.
-I wish my GPS had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
-More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.
-Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
-Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.
-I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
-There is a great need for sarcasm font.
-Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.
-I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.
-How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
-I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
-The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to finish a text.- Was learning cursive really necessary?
- Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say".
- I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
-Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".
- How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said
-While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.
-MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
- Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
- Bad decisions make good stories.
- Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be a problem.
-"Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.- I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'
-I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? ), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away? (MOM I DEDICATE THIS TO YOU!!)
-I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
- I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.
- Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...- As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
-Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
-I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
-Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it
-I wonder if cops ever get ticked off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.
-I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

3 comments:

Mr and Mrs Smith said...

I love the comments, I just about agreed with every single one of them! :) a friend of mine used the mario kart one on facebook the other day, I thought he was real clever...hmmm

Sterling & Alicia said...

Ha ha ha ha ha!!! Breezy, can I just tell you how much I MISS and LOVE YOU! I agree with every single comment you made and I really am "LOL"! Good luck with the job hunt and stay safe out there in Michigan.

Heidi said...

I love those random thoughts too. I read them the other day somewhere and thought they were all writen about me.